The Rozen Brooch
by Yarbo
Summary: The golden brooch my mother wore, She left behind for me to wear; I have no thing I treasure more: Yet, it is something I could spare. Based off of the poem "The Courage My Mother Had"
1. Chapter 1

_**Prologue  
**_

_The Courage That My Mother Had_

The courage that my mother had  
Went with her, and is with her still:  
Rock from New England quarried;  
Now granite in a granite hill.

The golden brooch my mother wore  
She left behind for me to wear;  
I have no thing I treasure more:  
Yet, it is something I could spare.

Oh, if instead she'd left to me  
The thing she took into the grave!-  
That courage like a rock, which she  
Has no more need of, and I have.

_- By **Edna St. Vincent Millay**_

* * *

**_The Gold Rose_**

* * *

She never wore the same thing twice it seemed, except for the rose, the golden rose. No matter what the season or weather she had the brooch pined near her left shoulder. In the days of my childhood the golden rose seemed to sparkle and glimmer when any amount of light hit it. That may have been my childhood imagination but the image of her teaching my class with her sparkling brooch will be forever ingrained into my memory.

My mother was an extraordinary woman. Her cheerful spirit inspired her students to overcome any challenge and always try their best. I clearly remember the day when she exhibited this quality, it was like she made magic happen.

Phoebe was and is an incredibly intelligent person; however she always had one problem at school. Do you remember the kid that never brought anything to class? When the teacher would say "If everyone brings and finishes their assignment we'll do this and this," the next day that one student would not have their work done and it would make everyone very aggravated - that was Phoebe.

For Phoebe, forgetting about her assignments did not happen every once in awhile – no, this happened every single day. If you've ever done it yourself, you know how frustrating it can be to completely forget about the homework you were assigned and then show up at school realizing you failed to remember once again. It makes you believe that you will never succeed no matter what you do.

This happened to Phoebe; and as a result she started to skip school and went to the caves near town all day. My mother finally caught onto this when Phoebe was gone for the third day. Instead of reporting to her parents and letting Simon and Barbara deal with the problem, she took it into her own hands. She had asked my father, the mayor, to watch the class while she went out for an hour during one school day. I don't know what it was she said to Phoebe, but within an hour she was back with Phoebe who tackled her missing assignments with a vigor we never knew she had.

My mother had creativity that could engage the child with even the shortest attention span, the students whom under different circumstances would never have participated did so with excitement. In my class those students where Luke and Maya together, for them I'm sure she would do a cartwheel need be.

Her greatest quality in my eyes however would be her courage. She was the most courageous women in the whole town to me. She had overcome feats which many people could never have imagined. An alcoholic mother who was barely there and a drug addict of a father who sat around all day watching Jeopardy. Instead of wallowing in her misery she left that miserable scene behind. While attending High School, she lived on the streets without succumbing to the temptations that wait at every corner. She graduated with flying colors and she continued on to one of the top colleges in the state and got a degree in English and Math with a minor in History and Latin.

She moved onto this little town where she met my father. He as a young man was very charismatic with people, but became a blubbering idiot when around pretty girls. Despite him being short, chubby, and saying the strangest things around her, she somehow or another she fell in love with him. Since as I mentioned before he was a blubbering idiot around pretty girls and took so long, she ended up being the one to propose. They were one of the last couples of their generation in town to marry. Shortly after they wedded I was born.

I have no idea how it is that two charismatic people could have a child as socially awkward as I, but my parents did. Despite their best efforts, as a child I would never engage with the children my age. As I grew up my closest friend was Jin, a boy almost five years older than me. Although I only played with him it was only during school or town events. There were also the Harvest Sprites, but my parents believed them to be make believe.

As you can imagine my lack of socialization frustrated my parents endlessly. Why was it that their six year old son was reading Treasure Island instead of playing with the boys or even girls around town? It's not like they were doing anything wrong, or that they sheltered him.

It wasn't their fault at all. I was too frightened of kids, shy I guess you could say. I lacked the courage to ask Luke or Owen if they wanted to play cars or whatever it is I would have played with at that age.

My life changed week before the first day of school, my freshman year. Mother had gone into the neighboring city to collect some supplies for the classroom, rulers and paper I think it was. She had left in the late afternoon and said she would most likely return late at night, and not to stay up for her. My father and I alike abided and went to sleep without her for the first time in years. Little did we know we would continue without her for the rest of our lives.

My father awoke me the next morning, which was odd since I usually awoke by the alarm clock. His face was blotted red, he had been crying, he was crying. While Father was not the type of man to contain his emotions, he rarely cried since we had a fairly happy life.

He told me that there had been an accident. I quickly did a check list in my head to see what could have been wrong.

He told me that Mother was in it.

I started to get up, thinking that she was in the hospital; the thought that she could have been dead didn't even cross my mind.

He said that Mom was dead.

I can't correctly describe my emotions at the time. I'm not sure if anyone could in that situation. It's a shock. I didn't even question my father, why would he lie about that? My mind wouldn't be able to grasp the fact that she was gone, never coming back for at least a year. Still though, I think now and again that I should tell my mother this or that, and then I recall she's dead.

She had been walking to the harbor where Pascal was awaiting for her. Having gathered all the items she needed, my mother was weary and ready to be home. She never made it to the seaside. A drunken driver ran her over and proceeded to run into a brick building. I don't hate the woman that ran into her. For she died too, her family came to us in their grieving and did the only thing they could do, apologies. I've never had any ill will towards him.

Our small town had suffered a great loss. Not only was she the mayor's wife and the only teacher. She was a enchanting woman who would be greatly missed by the children of the island and the adults alike.

Her funeral was a week later; in her coffin she wore her golden brooch. I stared at her face; she was wearing a lot of makeup, Mother had never worn makeup she had the rare natural beauty; I suppose it was to cover up the scars of the accident. I stared at her brooch, saddened by the thought that it would no longer twinkle in the light as she taught me and my fellow students. My father was next to me, upon seeing me looking at the brooch he told me to take it. He said that she would have wanted me to have it. So I did.

Since then there was nothing I treasured more, no item in my position or that I could possibly want that I could or would treasure more. To me it's a representation of my mother's soul. Pure and beautiful, a golden rose.

It's been nearly 14 long years; I'm well over the worst of it, for children are prepared for when their parents die, even when they die half life of 38. I'm in love now. She moved to the island almost a year ago, to start a farm. In many ways she reminds me of my mother. Not only that but she's saving this dying lass of land with her hard work and effort at her farm. I wish to spend my life with this girl.

I began wearing the brooch, in hopes that her spirit, her courage would rub off on me. Still, I lack the courage to express my love to the girl of my dreams. The courage my mother had that went with her everywhere is still with her now.

Why Mother, why did you leave me this accursed pin? I'd give away my treasured Rosen Brooch for what I need. Why couldn't you of left me what you took with your body to your cold rocky grave? What you no longer are in need of and I have need– courage unwavering.

* * *

This fic was inspired by the Poem "The Courage My Mother Had" It's a really good poem, I recommend it.

What made me want to write it was the fact that Gill's mother was dead and that Gill does wear a golden brooch that's shaped like rose in the Fall and Winter. The poem is about that. Around that Fall or Winter, in the game Gill started saying his 'romantic' things so I made the connection that Gill wore it for courage. I was also inspired from the story Natsume posted about Gill's mother.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

* * *

I glared at the advertisement my father had dropped onto my desk. Eyebrows furrowing in deep thought, I read the zoo advertisement again.

_Feel as though your town lacks vitality and your tourist amounts dropping even lower each year with there being no hope of restoration in the far off future? _

I couldn't exactly be positive, but it looks like a run on sentence to me. How trustworthy could a zoo be if it couldn't even advertise things correctly? Father was excited of the thought of a zoo, but then again my father was an easily excitable person.

There was a rush of winter wind that flew through the opened door as someone entered. I didn't even need to look up to see who it was. By the way she threw the door wide open, and not so delicately walked, he knew it was Hikari. Why must that woman always come at the most inappropriate times.

Oh no, why must you be here now? I'm not prepared for you at, especially after the other night. Do things change? Am I supposed to be romantic and loving? Why can't I think of anything to say? If she were Elli or Jin there'd be no problem. Goddess, why is it all I can think about is wanting to impress her, but not of anything to impress her with.

"Hey Gill!"

I'm not prepared to have a conversation with her, everything's changed!

"Is there something I could help you with?" I smoothed my hair back, a nervous habit I picked up as a child.

"Yes, in fact there is! I want to buy some new land!"

New land? But she hasn't even been here for a year. Wouldn't that be a bit too much? She can't be ready for that! Hikari will work herself to exhaustion, her health will dilapidate.

"Are you sure you're ready for this? You haven't even been here for even a year. The farm was already fairly grungy; do you really think you could handle all of that extra work?"

Hikari frowned at me, had I said something wrong? I'm only worried about her – oh god what if I annoyed her? What if she can't stand me now for being so high handed. Father always said that I had a problem of lecturing people.

"I've already thought it all through, and it won't take too much extra work since I want to make it into an orchard – So I can make jams and juices! Wouldn't it be delightful? The smell of apples permeating the air in the fall.." She trailed off as she had a habit of doing.

I smoothed my way-ward hair again, embarrassed. This idea was brilliant, there wasn't too much work involved but the funds to buy the seeds and land. I should have expected this from her.

"It's an expensive thing to start, but if it turns out well I suppose it would be a great investment. I would help you, however Elli is in charge of that," I fiddled with a pen I hadn't realized was in my hands. "She's on lunch break, if you would take a seat over there, she should be back soon."

She grinned and nodded, walking over to the green couch by the door. The couch was unfortunately situated in front of my desk. An awkward silence flooded the air like the smell of flowers on her clothes. I wished that she would say anything, lest I have to come up with something clever to come up with. My desires were not meant to be.

"I've never seen you wear that pin before, is it new?" For a moment I was confused what she talking about, then I remember the brooch.

Not bothering to look up from my work I responded, "No, I've had this for a very long time." Hoping that would be the last of our conversation.

"It's really pretty, why haven't you worn it before?"

Well damn it, this woman is relentless. What am I suppose to tell her? That I was wearing it for the courage my dead mother had, so I could tell her that I love her? Yeah that would go over well, I'd probably frighten her away. Loose my chance for happiness and live alone for the rest of my life as she moves on to someone else.

"I like it; it seems to glimmer even in the shadows, like magic." She didn't bother waiting for my response. Maybe she knew I wouldn't have answered it.

Before I could digest what Hikari had just said, Elli strolled in through the door. As she took off her winter jacket she commented on the weather. "Brr, it's a cold one today! At this rate we'll have snow before the Harvest Festival," now noticing Hikari she asked "Hey Hikari! What are you doing here? Wanna help out?"

Hikari shook her head, "Nope," making a popping sound at the 'P', "not today! I actually want to buy some land, for an orchard."

"Well follow me then, and I'll get you situated." Elli said as she walked over to her desk, with Hikari trailing behind her.

I sat there not exactly listening listening Elli go over the procedure of buying land. My mind was on other things. Things that troubled me. I always thought I was different from both of my parents, but as of recently I've begun to consider otherwise. When I was but a little boy Father would occasionally comment on his luck in life. He would tell me

"I was never good with the ladies; always stuttering and stuck on my tongue, and yet I seemed to have pulled the lucky card and marry the prettiest gal in town!"

Could I be more like my father than I orginially imagined, more than I could possibly want?

* * *

_Not exactly crazy for this chapter, it's too short, but I suppose it could have been worse… The next one is currently in Free Write Form, in my Hello Kitty Journal.. which I wrote in with my Iron Man pencil…_


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

"Elli," I began, "I need you to call Simon up. It's about time we filmed the next News Update." I'm not quite sure but for some reason I had been putting this off. It's not like I've forgotten about it, in fact it's been in the back of my mind for quite some time.

"That's right!" Elli blurted out; it appeared she had forgotten about it. "The Starry Night Festival is in a few days!" She looked at me inquisitively, "Do you plan on asking a certain someone_?"_

It was fairly easy to guess who this certain someone was. It was Hikari, the farmer who moved here this last spring. I had asked out to dinner a few weeks ago and since then Elli has been teasing me mercilessly.

I had been intending to invite her out again, but alas it was hard enough asking her out the first time. Requesting her to go out with me to the most romantic festival? I think not. Beside that problem, the New Year's Festival will be not even a week after that! It's the festival with the biggest tourist amount. I'll be much too busy.

Glad to have an excuse from my would be humiliation (had she rejected me)I said to Elli "I won't be able to, the New Year's Festival is so soon afterwards I'll most likely have to stay late every night to plan for it." I turned my head as if to look out the window, although I was actually grinning from this convenient excuse.

Wiping the grin from my face I turned back to look at Elli. I was surprised by the look on Elli's face, she seemed almost furious. It was an expression I had yet to see on her face, and never thought I would see on it.

"Don't you even dare to bail out on Hikari! This is the festival every girl should be escorted to by the man she cares for. I'll be damned if I just sit by and let you stay late working while she sits at home heartbroken missing the most romantic festival of the year." She had said this with such passion one would think as though Elli had gone through the same thing. Then it struck me, could that of been the reason why Elli up and left her family? The man she loved failed to ever express his feeling for her, or even worse fell for another.

I sat there struck dumb by this sudden realization. It had never occurred to me that my happy go getter coworker could have experienced such misfortune.

I found my voice and softly asked Elli "If she really wanted to go with me she'd ask me herself."

Elli made a frustrated sound. "You always seem so indifferent about her she's not quite sure whether or not she's annoying you."

What I had been about to say left me. Did Hikari actually think that? Wasn't it obvious I was so far gone for her that I was at a loss of what to say to her? I was fairly certain she knew about my unease around her.

She went on with her rant. "I swear Gilligan Hamilton," opting to use my name like my mother or father would have if I had been misbehaving. "Don't you dare do so..." Her face lightened up as if she had an idea or had just remembered something. "Then again I just remembered something; Chase, the other day when I was helping out at the inn, had said he was planning on asking her out to the festival. So suppose it doesn't matter, you'll be like you always have; alone and working, and Hikari will be able to go to her first Starry Night Festival with Chase."

I let out a breath of air I hadn't realized I had been holding. Hikari with _Chase_? That finicky little pretty boy? I thought he was interested in Maya; well he is for sure finicky indeed. I looked at Elli in disbelief, hoping to see any sign that she had been lying. Unfortunately she was no longer facing me, making her way towards the phone.

I got up; telling Elli there was something I needed from the library. She nodded not able to reply, I could however, feel her grinning behind me. I'm sure she knew that was only a pretense that I was truly going up there to be alone.

Ever since I was a child the library had been my sanctuary, I could spend hours on end in there. Nobody ever went up there anymore, while in the room I would feel as though I were a million miles away from the world. The room gave off a musty smells, a mixture of dust and book decay. I relished in the smell as I reflected on things. I had long since finished reading all the books in here; we had such a sad little collection. Had there been more funds to spare I would have loved to bought more.

All this time, ever since I had first met the girl, I had been only focusing on my own emotions. Of my fear and love for her that I hadn't even considered to think of Hikari's emotion. All I had cared about was me, and my image.

My promise that I made when I was a child, was that I would strive to achieve perfection. I would make my parents proud to have me as their son, even with my fault of being shy. In my quest for perfection I lost touch with reality, I became a proud person, no longer improving stuck on a pin, rotating and no longer growing. My pride has gotten in the way. I've been unwilling to show any sign of weakness I've gone and confused the one that I love.

I let out an audible sigh, getting up I started for the stairs. I would change; I would go up to her at ask her to –

"Oh! Gill"

It was Elli, I hadn't been paying attention to where I was walking and had bumped into her.

"I was coming up here to tell you that I had called Simon and he said he's be here around noon tomorrow assuming he can get a break that is, also that I'd be heading off for the day and that you should be too."

Was it five o'clock already? I hadn't even noticed. "Very well, I have to finish something up so I'll stay a bit later." Elli gave me a disapproving stare, but she should very well of expected me to stay late, it's not as though I've ever done anything different.

"Well… Have a nice day," she said a little sadly.

I sighed after she had left. I had forgotten about filling out a reply letter to Theodore. Writing, proofread, sign, stamping, and the works would take me at least an hour. I had so hoped that I'd be able to speak to her right away…

I worked diligently for 45 minutes, I knew this only because I kept glancing at the clock. I was able to finish the letter earlier than I originally imagine. I stared at the sealed envelope, gather my courage. I would walk up to her farm and ask her before she had the chance to reply. And... If she denied me… well I won't think of that.

I examined my surrounding, surprised to see that I had already arrived to her farm. However it didn't appear as though she was there. Since all of the lights were out. I blew out a frustrated sigh. If Hikari wasn't on the farm, god knows where she'd be. For all I know she could be in the mines.

Dejected, I went my way towards town. I was extremely hungry; I wasn't exactly in the mood to make my own bland dinner. I sighed again, and began to make way towards the Sundae Inn.


End file.
